Stressed Out and Tired, But Doing What I Love!
I sit down at my desk. I put my headphones in. I put on Spotify. I open my computer and check my email. I begin my homework assignments and projects. I have done this routine throughout college for what seems like the millionth time. College, especially for a music major, can feel like an unending slog of homework, rehearsals, and practice. As my senior year at CSUN begins, I feel the familiar tiredness and stress peek over my shoulder like annoying younger siblings. Starting my fourth year at school, I sometimes lose sight of the big picture. Why am I working so hard? Why music? Why do I put myself through the stress of school?
The arts have always been my life. Even when music was not my career path, music always had a spot in my life. Piano was my first introduction to music. Despite the years of wanting to quit, my mother kept me at it. Moms are smart. Piano is now one of my greatest joys and a perfect way to decompress after a stressful week. Piano was the beginning of my journey to where I am now. Along the way to college, I found musical theatre. I loved the acting and dancing, but above it all, I loved the singing. Shocker, I know. Musical theatre was a place I could laugh, act ridiculously, and sing. It wasn’t all perfect, but the arts remained a natural place for a Will Brooks to call home. Next, I found choir. Stephanie Davis, a CSUN grad and my future voice teacher, taught a high school choir and I found more amazing friends and a place to sing.
I will never forget her telling me that I could have a career in music. I must have been a freshman or sophomore in high school. I was blown away. I had never thought that music was a viable career option. I trusted her so I took lessons and I prepared for college auditions.
However, the answer of why I do what I do is unrelated to my professional musical potential. It has to do with how the arts developed me as a person. Through the arts, I dealt with disappointment. My family knows how distraught I was about not getting the lead in Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat during my sophomore year. Through the arts, I learned discipline. I had to practice the piano every day. I saw the improvements and benefits that discipline gave. I also learned how to present myself and allow myself to be critiqued. Even if I never pursued music after high school, I know how much music and the arts impacted my development and personal growth.
That is why I do what I do. I want to further the arts. I want more students to understand and enjoy the benefits of the arts. I want to them experience the joys that music and the arts afforded me. Which brings this all back to my project. The arts aren’t all equally accessible to all people. Whether good or bad, this is simply the fact in 21st century America. I wanted to make a way to bring music, specifically private voice lessons to more students. I know firsthand the influence and impact voice lessons had on my development. However, the economic challenge of making this happen, especially as a college student seemed like too big of an obstacle. My answer to how to overcome this challenge was to broker the experience of the CSUN pedagogy students and create a project with the CSUN students giving individual voice lessons. This idea has now grown into a fledgling project!
The lessons are just now gearing up. I have spent countless hours emailing my contacts at Lighthouse and Valley Academy of Arts and Sciences. I have pored over my computer trying to iron out the wrinkles in the schedule (Signupgenius has been my best friend!). As I have met with each student, I am a bit overwhelmed at the project. It is no longer an essay in an application. It is directly benefiting the students from the schools as well as giving the CSUN voice majors valuable experience. It is so important for CSUN to be reaching out to the local schools.
So now, sitting down at my desk, I remember why I am doing this. I am proud of what I have accomplished and excited for what I will accomplish. Yes, I am stressed and tired, but I am happy to be doing what I love.
I know you are tired and stressed Will, but that just tells me you know you are on the right track and doing something that benefits others. There have been so many generous people along the way who have given you input, picked you up when you were down. That was preparation as well.
Now and maybe for a lifetime you were created to be that special person no-one will ever forget.
Grandpa and I are so proud of your work. You are humble and dedicated and talent runs out of your ears, but you always find time for others. Remember when you played Soccer? you played with all your heart, you ran as fast as you could, you were one of the best. Don’t forget that drive, because you are a winner my young man.